Things I Don’t Get

I adore make-up and the girly fun that goes with it, but there are a lot of things that stop me short and make me wonder exactly what some women are thinking. Here are just a few:

  • *BOTOX*: I realize we’ve touched on this previously, but let’s consider this again. Paralyzing your face muscles with toxins related to food poisoning, for the sole purpose of reducing wrinkles. Hmmm. Sure, sounds reasonable…for a neurotic, self-obsessed princess who wears “Hottie” baby T’s.

*WAXING EYEBROWS*: I had a friend who religiously had her brows waxed and would moan how shaggy and unkempt she was when she went longer than 15 seconds without an appointment with the eyebrow-ripper. Intrigued by her devotion, I actually tried it once. Expecting a magical transformation, I eagerly grabbed the mirror once the waxing was over, and behold…no perceptible difference whatsoever! Unless your eyebrows closely resemble wooly caterpillars mating above your eyes, I seriously doubt this beauty ritual is necessary.

*PINK OR RED EYESHADOW*: Redness around the eyes is typically a symptom of a hangover, lack of sleep, illness, pink-eye or other disease of the mucous membranes. This is the look you are going for?

*TALON FINGERNAILS*: Clearly a status symbol of not needing to wash dishes, type, make sudden movements, or perform other menial tasks requiring full use and control of your hands…they are certainly attention-getting, but they instantly conjure images of LaFonda from Napoleon Dynamite for me. Being a working gal, I simply can’t get past the enormous impracticality of it.

That was just to get us started. What is on your “WTF?” list of beauty trends or practices?

*to be continued!*


7 thoughts on “Things I Don’t Get

  1. I’m just laughing too much to response adequately right now! ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!I’ll be back..oh, will that make me look like a blog stalker? My laughter has ceased. I am engulfed by fear of possibly being labeled a stalker. Yikes!

  2. Ok, I’m sure the list could be longer, but here goes:real jewels, diamonds, rubies, etc glued onto those claw fingernailsstick-on earrings for little girls-what?are girdles, bras, and pantyhose supposed to be fun and comfy?ear scoring-is that what it is called? Does that even go under this category?striped hair-enough said!

  3. Wow, love the new site design.I have seen pink eyeshadow work for people from time to time but it is always mingled with browns. But I totally agree botox and talon finger nails are absurd. And Vanessa Williams swears by Botox, but I gotta say, I don’t ever want to look like her. She looks so old and y’all know she isn’t.

  4. Can I just say that I am secure enuf in myself to say I have a total girl crush on you? ROFL In a non-insane, non-stalking, regular chick kinda way of course.. hahaha You love hockey and shoes and make-up…*batting eyelashes* You are just so dreamy… hahahhahaha I shot tea out me snout when I saw a mention of LaFonda from Napoleon Dynamite in this post… *howl* I’ll have you know that I pretend to work and look serious when I read your blogs. This humor thing must be carefully examined LOL LOL LOLOk, back to me looking all serious like I’m actually working… Yes, talon nails – hideous. Pink or red eye shadow – gross. Eye gunk isnt attractive. Botox – while I see the appeal in the result, I cannot get past the fact that its injecting skunky food poisoning into one’s face. Ick.Eyebrow waxing – I’ve done it several times but it huuuuuurts.

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